For Niner...

For Niner….

We had to say goodbye to one of the core horses of Laurelin Farm on August 3, 2024.  It was one of the hardest calls I’ve had to make, but she can breathe easy now.  I will be in mourning for a long while, her grace taught me more than any other spiritual teacher I’ve had on how to be a good teacher to others.  She was the first Wind Horse to grace the farm, and I am certain not the last, Glory and Leah will fill her horseshoes in their own ways.  Here is a dream I was granted; I think she meant it to be shared with the many hearts she has touched.

A white mare and I are walking in a sunny field of bright green grass, yellow and silvery dandelions everywhere, so many it seems we are floating in a sea of gold and fluff. The little puffs of seeds lifting at our steps give the white mare a faint haze of wings and a halo around her head. We walk slowly and pause, sampling the grass, smelling the smells, and on a whim, I pull out a long length of blue and silver ribbon and braid it into her mane.  Silver for a perfect friendship, blue for the freedom of the sky, and combined for the renewing power of love.

As we continue to walk, the white mare starts pulling ahead of me, as grazing horses are wont to do. She is always the lead mare in the pasture, other horses would trail in her wake of motherly peace. She gets farther and farther from me, and I feel the pull of gravity and the drag of the tall grass on my feet as I am left behind. The white mare continues to walk, slowly gaining height, and stops and turns back to look at me one last time. She looks at me as if to reassure me that this is the way of the earth and the spirit.  Her gaze of serene and complete Divine Love stops me in my tracks. I watch as she proceeds on, gaining speed towards the heavens at a brisk trot, giving a brisk swish of her tail as if to say, see you again in this world or the next…

I slowly sit down into the grass, and water the flowers with my tears, feeling truth and love holding me safe, holding me lessons and experiences with her in the deepest part of my being. I vow to try to come close to her grace and give love to others as she did.

This mare is Niner, she is healing love, the kind of Trueness so deep that she could carry everyone without complaint.  She carried a lucky few up a literal and figurative mountain or two. She accepted tears and laughter equally, with the same loving grace that hurts to fathom. Her eyes so bright and caring that her gaze could initiate flashes of intuition towards a Power so strong that it brought tears of happiness, and of worry that I am not worthy of such grace.  But then the next small child (or adult with an inner child waiting to burst out) would come for their first riding lessons, and she would stand so still, so carefully, so sure that she would be loved and cared for, that nothing else mattered.

She was so present, and so motherly, her spirit was always half in the heavens already. She knew the paths of love instinctively.  She trusted in the divine without doubt, pure presence, even when ill, knowing that what will be will be.  The Ram Dass of horses is Niner. 

Her message is simple, ‘Do not be afraid of Love’.  Be as a mother and know when to take care and walk so gently and so carefully, and know as well when to walk faster and to push her chosen riders to do better, to ride in Balance.  She taught all her riders, whether they knew it or not, to Love more, to break inner boundaries down, to move towards adventures towards Oneness.  She was never not present, she was always here, and will live on through her son, Glory, and her lessons in Giving.